CommenTerry

Random Rants and Raves #108

I don't understand people who can look neat while doing hard work. My hair is usually sweating out of place, my shirt is sticking to me, and my pants are sliding down -- and that's before I even get started!          

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The term "enhanced interrogation techniques" is nothing more than a politically correct euphemism for torture.

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There are two ways to look at failure in a positive light: (1) As evidence that the time is not quite right for a given endeavor or (2) as a way of eliminating something else that doesn't work for you in your journey to what does work for you.

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I suppose the major advantage of emails and text messages is that neither can be overheard.

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I never give away my trade secrets. That's because I know there are so many people out there who, if they only knew how, could do what I do much better than I can. 

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Sometimes "delay and frustrate" can work just as well as "shock and awe."

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Don't try to tell me the U.S. enforces fair housing laws when a mortgage company is allowed to forgive some of the debt of one mortgagee without having to forgive an equal amount of debt of all its other mortgagees. 

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If I was interested in history, I would have been born a lot earlier. 

Observe, Then Act Accordingly

For those of you who are like me and not all that smart, the best way to act intelligently is to observe what the smart people and the dumb people around you are doing and act accordingly. We all know who the smart ones are and who the dumb ones are. If something is being done by most of the smart people and not being done by most of the dumb people,  then by all means do it. Conversely, if something is being done by most of the dumb people and not being done by most of the smart people, then by all means don't do it. It can't get any simpler than that.

Now You Know

I'm often asked why I never back into a parking space. My response is that there is much more room outside of a space that inside of one and that I need the extra room for "margin of error" when driving in reverse. I also mention that I have difficulty backing an automobile because of a birth defect -- I was born without eyes in the back of my head!

Classic Rants and Raves #14

When you're a kid, everything you destroy belongs to someone else. When you're an adult, everything someone else destroys belongs to you!

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One of the primary functions of a hospital is to humiliate its patients as much as possible!

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For some reason, I keep thinking golfer Davis Love is a tennis player.

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When you were in high school, did you notice a kind of fuzzy math? Although the girls outnumbered the guys, every girl had a boyfriend, but not every guy had a girlfriend. Calling Mr. Einstein ..

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They say tough times build character. That doesn't seem like much consolation to me!

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The best public service that television could do for police officers everywhere would be for Fox to cancel Cops.

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You can't predict the future, but you can often predict markets with futures.

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Revenge is sweet, but only if it's of the legal variety. Getting back at someone in an illegal way does nothing but cause more trouble for the avenger.

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The anti-smoking mania is starting to get to the ridiculous level that I predicted it would. Not too long ago, a judge in Virginia sentenced a woman to 10 days in jail for smoking in her own home in front of her kids.

Laughter Is Never a Waste of Time

The more sanctimonious among us will say time spent watching comedies on TV is a total waste. I say not necessarily. Medical science has proven that laughter has a healing effect. As long as one doesn't spend excessive amounts of time in front of the TV set, I see no problem with getting a daily dose of comedy. Time spent improving one's health is never a waste, no matter what anyone says.

This Should Be Required Reading

The Book of Ecclesiastes should be required reading for every high school graduate. The reason is not for the religious purposes, but for the purpose of life lessons. The writer of this book is coming to the end of his life after having all the riches, achievements, and fame anyone could ever ask for. Despite all of this, he communicates to his readers how meaningless these things can be.

Why I Can't Get Excited About Retirement

So many people, even those in their 30's and 40's, are gleefully looking forward to the day they retire. After all, many of them will have well over $1 million in their 401(k) plans and/or IRAs by the time they reach retirement age. If money were the only factor in the retirement equation, their happy anticipation would be justified.

Unfortunately for many of them, retirement will still be a bust, despite the big nest egg. Not even counting those who will drop dead before drawing their first dollar of retirement income, a high number of them will have poor health from day one of retirement. I have yet to see a sickly old man or woman in a nursing home who was impressed with how money he or she had for retirement.

Random Rants and Raves #107

If anger is your only motivation to do well, then be angry.          

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Gas has gone up another 10 cents a gallon in just a few days. This time, a guy in Denver is being blamed for the increase because he accidentally kicked over a can of gasoline!

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Notre Dame Quarterback Brady Quinn surprisingly was the 22nd selection in the recent NFL draft, even though he was projected by many to be one of the top five picks. I guess he wasn't so mighty after all. 

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Even when you don't feel good, it's best to act as if you do.

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The company now known as AT&T is actually SBC, which bought out AT&T, subsequently took on the AT&T name, and later bought out Bell South, after having been broken off from AT&T in 1984 along with Bell South and the other "Baby Bells." Got that?   

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I know a guy who bought his son a box of facial tissues for a graduation present -- as a reminder to keep his nose clean.

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There's just a fine line between meting out a just penalty and acting spiteful. Sometimes I have a hard time finding that line. 

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I rarely get any inspiration for my writing while sitting in front of my computer. Instead, it usually comes when I'm doing household chores or driving to work.

Another Roman Empire? I Think Not

Our modern Western culture has often been compared to the Roman Empire. There are people who sincerely believe that our culture will become worse and worse, accelerating down the road toward unfettered depravity and debauchery, until it ultimately implodes like the Roman Empire did.

To those who worry that these predictions might be right, I say relax - it's not going to happen. As a culture, there are lines that that we will charge right up to, but will never cross. We will continue to get closer to the predicted end, but will never get there. Think of it like dividing by two. One can start with any positive number and divide by two and then divide the result by two and then divide that result by two, etc., etc. The subsequent results will get closer and closer to zero but a result equaling zero will never be reached.

Make no mistake; there are individuals who know no limits. However, as a society, we seem to have a collective conscience that keeps us within certain constraints. 

Why I Lost All Respect for My Former Governor

I lost all respect for former Virginia Governor Jim Gilmore when he failed to right an injustice back in 2000 when he was still governor. He allowed a man to be executed for participating in the murders of his girlfriend's parents when he was 17 years old. The thing that made this so inequitable was that his girlfriend, who was 14 years old at the time and an equal participant in the murders, served just seven years in a juvenile detention center and was then released when she turned 21.

Where was the justice in that? Not only should the man have been spared execution, should have been released from prison at age 24. I suppose Gilmore was afraid of not seeming like a "law and order" governor. However, in my book, fairness trumps law and order every time. Gilmore is now running for the 2008 Republican presidential nomination. He will definitely not get my vote.